A story of a HIV/AIDS victim

The Case Story:- Zainudin was born on the 2nd of June 1956 as the eldest son in the family. He is a Malay Muslim. His father  was an army officer.The family had to shift often as the army officer had to move from station to station.

In 1957 :- A sister who is one year younger to him was born.

In 1963 :- 2nd sister was born. Young Zainudin was very close to this baby taking her for pram rides.He loved his two sisters.

In 1965 this baby died. The death of the baby broke the family.In shock with the deprivement and the loss of the baby precipitated strife, pain, anger and bitterness in the heart of the family. The mother reacted fiercely to the loss. Zainudin’s maternal aunty who was a nurse in the government hospital,adopted a baby girl for the family. When the adopted baby came, peace filled Zainudin’s home again.He was 10 years old then.

Zainudin’s mother was the queen controller of the house. She was the scolding type,sadistic in her ways. She often abused Zainudin by beating him with his father’s belt till he was bruised. All this happened from the time he was 10 years old. If the mother was upset,frustrated and angry, Zainudin was her target,filled with verbal and physical abuse. Her motto, “Mother is always right”. The mother is very selfish in her ways, even till today.

Zainudin still harbours a grudge of unforgiveness as far as his mother was concerned.Mother has never hugged or embraced him,no maternal kisses or love filled words were given to him. His two sisters received all the maternal hugs and kisses.This still hurts Zainudin even now as the mother is still alive today.Father had never abused him.His father was full of tolerance,love and care.

1970 :- Zainudin’s father was transferred to East Malaysia.Mother and sisters had followed father to East Malaysia,leaving behind 13 year old Zainudin with a spinster school teacher aunt at Kampong Baru,Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia. 
Kampong Baru was a notorious place. Almost all the shops there were selling drugs.Zainudin mixed with the Negative Notorious boys in the school.
Zainudin was the apple in the eyes of his maternal grandma and aunty. He was the top student until Form Two in the secondary school.No one scolded  or abused him except his mother.

He started playing truant from Form Three.He mixed with Negative Students in school. Exposed to drugs in Form Two to Form Five.He scored an “A” in his Form Three exam.Studied till Form Five,failed all subjects in MCE (Malaysian Certificate of Education)His parents were back from East Malaysia then and he made a second attempt at MCE in the same secondary school and he was able to score a Grade Three this time.

Notorious boys took alcohol and drugs in joints and pubs while wearing school uniforms.At the age of seventeen he had worked as a bar tender and waiter,his friends were all bad hats.

“Birds of a same feather flock and fly together”.

1971 :- Started marijuana and alcohol drinking.

Zainudin and his friends used to steal money for drugs and drinking. All his friends were failures in examinations. The school gave them public caning. Zainudin was still staying with his maternal aunty while he was drinking alcohol,smoking pot and playing truant and stealing money at home. No one at home suspected that Zainudin was changing to a useless being amongst the bad crowd of friends. Friends shared and bought drugs and beers. After MCE (Malaysian Certificate of Education) he had stopped studying and started working in 1976.

In 1976 he had started working as a sales clerk in a Semi-government Company.The salary was RM700.00 per month.There he had fallen in and out of love with many girl; every week he had changed girl friends but he denies having sexual relationships with them.

“Money is the root cause of all Evils.”

Zainudin was 20 years old then and had money; he had been to massage parlours at Bukit Bintang where the girls introduced sex. Zainudin received his first kiss from a prostitute;it was an empty feeling for him then,nothing emotional.No feelings of guilt either.There was no one to advise him,and no one to show him the right and the wrong direction. Parents,aunty and grandma never showed love with physical contact.No hugs or kisses amongst the family members,except for his sisters,who had received hugs and kisses from his parents.He was terribly hurt by these actions.He worked for two years. He hurt himself by taking drugs.His wages were used for drugs.


(A)NEGATIVE THRILL SEEKERS :- The stuffs they take are in crystalline form.They are used the following ways:- 

i)burnt and the smoke and  inhaled.
ii)burnt and inhaled as vapours 
iii)intravenous use.

(B)    With heavy indulgence into drugs Zainudin had:-
i)  No interest in women or prostitutes.
ii) No more thinking of work.
iii) Drugs became his world.
iv) His feelings were numbed by drugs.

In 1978 onwards he could not work anymore,he was taught how to use needles with heroin.Zainudin had always been scared of needles.Smoking pot and intravenous drugs introduced 100% action from head to toe- for him this feeling was ten times better than smoking pot.He claimed that this produced a mind blowing sensation. He used size 27 needles that he had bought from Chinese shops.

When the craving for drugs started,his relationship with the girls and the boys were totally cut.He denies homosexual relationships.

(C)ARAMINE 5 (Amphetamine group):- This drug brings beautiful feelings but if the situation is disturbed there would be a bad hallucination. Overdose of it causes palpitation and blurring white visions.

In 1978 despite this condition he was called for police training,and managed to get through and became a police constable.Angry with himself,he tried to stop taking drugs himself.He took Aramine 5 only.He stopped taking heroin and tried to detoxification himself.Doing so he developed withdrawal symptoms.ie.bodyache,headache,hot ears,sweating,unable to eat or drink,jittery movements of his head left to right.It became worse the next day,and was forced to go back to heroin.Tried not to kill himself as he is a Muslim,he was scared to commit suicide.He became uncaring about family,religion or himself.Money he earned as car parking usherer was used for drugs.He was charged under road traffic ordinance and was imprisoned for two weeks.He gives the history of being jailed seventeen to eighteen times on drug charges.No crimes,just dosed with drugs as an offence.He was sent to Pusat Serenti (Govt.Rehabilitation Center) at Jelebu,Rawang and Kuala Kubu Bahru.

1986 Zainudin’s father, passed away.He felt guilty for his father’s death and the family also blamed him for that.After two weeks he went back heavy on drugs.No more feelings for family,no feelings of hatred,just drugs and existence.

After a while his mother gave him money to stay at home and take the drugs.In the year 2000 his mother handed him over to Pengasih (Persatuan Penagih Dadah Malaysia,at Bukit Tunku Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia).The registration fees was RM250.00 followed by RM700.00 per month. He was with Pengasih for ten years.After four months on the programme symptoms of AIDS were noted.

1993 – 2000 Exposure to sex,alcohol,drugs,syringes and pot,and Pengasih programmes in 2000,Zainudin was sick with AIDS, hence admitted to General Hospital,Kuala Lumpur for a week.He was bedridden,acquired Tuberculosis,Psoriasis,Oral Cendidiasis and was unable to eat or drink.His weight then was only 45 kilograms.

IPR (Institute Perubatan Respiratory)-Near General Hospital,Kuala Lumpur was where he was warded for there months. His mother was kind enough to bring food for him. At times he ate outside. He had taken anti-tuberculosis drugs for sixteen months. He had no reaction with these drugs.


2000- Zainudin had developed signs and symptoms for AIDS.
2001- Treated with HAART and anti-tuberculosis regime.He did not develop any reactions to these drugs.


2001- Treatment given: DDI, D4T, Stokerin

Patient was on this treatment from 2001 to 2003.When he had developed increase in serum amylase.DDI was stopped and changed to 3TC.

2003 to 2012 the treatment given:  T3TC (2003), D40, Stokerin

Zainudin stopped taking euphoric drugs from the 2000 till now. 1980 to 1990 Zainudin had memory loss due to drugs.He has a vague memory of street life and prison life.


1993 – He overcame the need to die due to the cravings for drugs.His religion had taught him not to commit suicide and the fear of death was embedded in him.
2000 – Non Government Organization Rehabilitation. Family support was totally given to Zainudin.Thus he was able to live to fight for another day.He lived to learn to overcome AIDS.Treatment with HAART had distorted the fat distribution,he had loss of weight,loss of hearing,decrease erection,and decrease in sexual desire as his body was in its weak diseased state. He had lost in strength,fear of HIV and the treatment of HAART and its side effects. His body adjusted to HAART regime.Able to survive and become normal.

Pengasih at Bukit Tunku have intensive programmes.The staffs are very committed to change the inmates lives and images for the better,eg. Zainudin is the living memory of success in Pengasih.


i) Before Pengasih: – Drug addicts were his friends.No one else was there in friendship at that time.
ii) After Pengasih:- Zainudin changed his ways,managed to give up the drugs.Drug addicts were not his friends anymore. A new horizon and a new way of life,Zainudin had adopted.He now lives to tell his story.
iii) In Pengasih for 10 years(Year 2000):- Zainudin became the P.A.to the President of Pengasih.He managed to advise and change the inmates.The treatment menu for the inmates was detoxification for two weeks followed by the programme of drug rehabilitation for a period of three months.He had dawning of life and had started the journey to become the living proof of the metamorphosis of a drug addict a normal human being.

Motto: “Man helps man. Man must help himself.”

Zainudin turned spiritually to God Almighty,new frontiers opened its wings.He was able to accept his disease as he had the support Pengasih.He was given training on administrative side using the computer.